Quiet Loneliness
by SoulfullyInclined
Summary: A Lila story. She's 17. Contains cutting. I don't own anyone. *Please Review.* Edited.
1. Chapter 1

I woke up that morning at 5 a.m. and realized something was wrong something was different. I went to my window, pulled back the curtain and looked outside; it was still dark out. I walked around the room and turned on the rest of the lights. Then walked out into the hall and turned on the hall lights. It was always dark at this hour. I woke up this early because I had ballet and ice skating. The sun didn't usually come up until 7, 8 or sometimes even 9. We were now in the dead of winter. I walked down the hall and noticed the door to the guest room, where our housekeeper usually stayed, was open. It was never open. I walked down the stairs and into the kitchen. There was a note on the counter with some brownies. I read the note;

_Lila-_

_I won't be here for awhile. You have my number._

_-Lisa_

Perfect. Just perfect. Not only had my father left me but so had my housekeeper. Now that she was gone I had more freedom. But this complicated things. And who was going to pay the bills? I guess my father was still paying them even after he left. I went to the bathroom, took out a razorblade and cut as I'd been doing since I was 14. I was now 17. That was 3 years ago. I then called Jessica.

"Hello?"

"Hi."

"Oh hi Lila."

"I'm sorry did I wake you up?"

"Yeah but it's ok."

"Oh."

"So what's up?"

"Well…Lisa left."

Lisa was my housekeeper.

"When?"

"Idinno. When I was asleep I guess."

"Wow."

"She left a note."

"Oh. Wow."

"Yeah I know."

"So…"

"Yeah I cut."

"Ok. Well you know. Just as long as…"

"I'm careful yes I know Jessica. Which"

"You always are."

"Yeah."

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	2. Ballet Class

When I got to ballet class several of the girls were there and already stretching, in the classroom and in the locker room. I went into the locker room and changed, then wrapped my toes and put my pointe shoes on. It was hard dancing on pointe but the dance teacher told me that I was ready for it. I had one pair for classes, one for rehearsals and one for performances. They were either white or pink and for the performances of Swan Lake and Nutcracker they were white. Each pair of pointe shoes cost $100 - $200. I had a ballet studio in my mansion. The classes lasted 2 hours and we usually started with the barre then traveled across the room and ended in the center. The stretches we did were…

Each winter term we did 3 ballets; Dracula, Swan Lake and Nutcracker. In the spring term we did Midsummer Night's Dream and Giselle. That was 5 ballets a year. We started classes in September and ended in May, then had a ballet camp all day during the summer. We performed Dracula at the end of October, the 29th, 30th, 31 and November 1st. We performed Swan Lake at the end of November and Nutcracker Xmas Eve and Xmas Day. We performed Giselle at the end of January and Midsummer Night's Dream in April. At each ballet school we were doing each performance which meant that those of us who were taking classes at more than 1 school had to rush to the other ballet school for the performances. We usually had a dress rehearsal the week of the show and the day of the show. It took us 1 to 2 hours to get ready for each show. I wasn't in Dracula or Giselle that year. This meant that instead of being in rehearsal for those shows I went to regular class.

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	3. Changes

I had moved from California to up north and now lived in a mansion in New York. My father was still in Chicago. He had decided to move there since he was always going there on business trips and left me stuck in the cold. To keep up appearances so the city wouldn't ask any questions we had said my housekeeper was my mother, my aunt, my sister, my cousin. My mother lived in Paris, I didn't know where any of my other relatives were and I didn't have any siblings. My mother had lived in Paris for as long as I could remember. She was there from when I was about 4 to 10 and then decided the flair, romance, elegance and class of Paris were better suited to her needs. My father had been taking business trips to Chicago all his life and finally one day just up and left.

I did have some friends, like some of the girls at school and in my ballet classes, of which I took 2 every day of the week, one in the afternoon and one in the morning. I took them at ABA, ABC and NYCB. I had been taking ballet all my life and was now on pointe because of it. We were currently rehearsing for the winter show, the Nutcracker. We were rehearsing the show at each ballet school of which there were only 3. I took ice skating also 2 hours a day every day of the week but we didn't have a show coming up. The thing I missed the most was my best friend, Jessica who I felt I had left just as my father had left me. She and I had been emailing and calling each other but it just wasn't the same. We had met several other girls through a message board.

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